February is the “love” month so what better way to celebrate is committing to a practice of self-compassion and self-love? This month my blogs will be about what I think the essential steps we need to take toward the practice of loving ourselves.
The first step I took was understanding that I am made up of many parts. Some of these parts are my true/authentic self, some are the labels that my specific tribe (Midwest small town, mostly white, middle class, etc) taught me, and some parts of me are the experiences I went through. Society likes “normal” and our primitive part gets scared when we step out of normal so we mold ourselves into the “shoulds”.
We need to learn about our parts, spend time with each one that comes to talk with us, and ask what they need. As we learn about the parts that come out to react to different situations, we can identify if they are parts of our real self or learned parts.
We meet a lot of resistance when we go against the “should” parts of us because those are the parts that are trying to keep us safe and away from new/scary things. These parts only know one thing – keep us safe and away from pain. New = scary & pain so fight to keep things normal. Your inner critic just may be the king of the hill as it tries to keep you from trying (and failing).
February blogs will be all about what I found to be essential for me to move more toward self love:
Projects and pages in your altered book will include: a Valentin’s Day card to yourself – How do I love ME, let me count the ways. . . ., a self-portrait for the author’s page in the back of your altered book, and archetype cards or fold out in your book.
Start listening to the recordings in your head and ask yourself what part is talking to you & why.